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Tuesday, July 27th, 2004
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10:41 pm - Stocktake
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So we had stocktake tonight. Keyed in all the stuff, all going well, until the end. someone stuffed up and entered the wrong filename.
Next thing I know I get accused of this fuckup without any proof. I know if wasn't me, I double checked myself before beginning. I checked my terminal which I hadn't logged off and it showed the correct file name, so it definatly wasn't me. But before I could prove my innocence someone went around loggin off all the terminals. This fucking bitch of a head admin still blames me and won't apologise for accusing me, despite the lack of proof. GRRRR!!!
she better steer clear of me tomorrow or I'll tell her what I really think...
Still, I think she had people reenter the things I entered, and if thats the case it's going to give me some cold measure of satisfaction knowing that it's going to completely fuck over the stock file!
current mood:  angry
current music: Offspring - Not The One
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Wednesday, June 23rd, 2004
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9:24 pm - My personal cocktail
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| How to make a Spawn |
Ingredients:
3 parts friendliness
3 parts brilliance
1 part energy |
Method:
Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Top it off with a sprinkle of lovability and enjoy! |
current mood:  amused
current music: (03) Nickelback - Someday
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Thursday, May 6th, 2004
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7:05 pm - Oh the irony...
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Theres something to be said about speeding past a big truck with 2 foot high words reading "Think Safe" on the back at the same time as going over a speed hump designed to slow you down. Sometimes I love irony...
current mood:  satisfied
current music: BloodHoundGang - I Hope You Die
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Sunday, May 2nd, 2004
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7:13 pm - W32.Sasser.Worm is out... get yours today! Err... or not...
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Sick of the Blaster worm? well that sucker spread well, but at least it didn't fuck your system over when you get infected. And so the latest worm is unleashed upon the unsuspecting peasants, and aside from annoying errors it's also quite likely to slow your computer to about as fast as a drunken snail. Win 9X users need not apply... The successful applicant must have XP / 2000 / NT
But all is not lost... patches are available here on Microsofts website.
Removal tools and details are available on Symantecs website to get rid of it if you get it. Or if you just want to make sure you don't.
Happy Patching everyone!
current mood:  cynical
current music: Offspring - Session
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Saturday, April 24th, 2004
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9:48 pm - Speed camera clocks motorist at 406 mph
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Since Brits already hold the land speed record as a result of jet-powered Thrust SSC going supersonic in 1997, it seems only natural that they should attempt to be the first nation to break the sound barrier with a petrol-driven reciprocating-engined vehicle.
That at least appears to be what sales manager Peter O?Flynn was attempting when clocked at an impressive 406mph (653kmph) by a speed camera in Cheshire.
The achievement becomes even more admirable when we learn that Peter was at the time at the controls of a humble Peugot 406, until now thought to have a top speed of 129mph.
Heroic Peter is modest about his tremendous effort, insisting: "I rarely speed and it?s safe to say I'll contest this." Officials, however, say Mr O?Flynn still faces prosecution despite the obvious attack of insanity which afflicted it's speed camera.
current mood:  good
current music: Natalie Imbruglia - Don't You Think
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(Read 20 messages | Talk to me dammit! )
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| Monday, April 19th, 2004
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12:37 pm - US man threatens anthrax attack on spammers
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So I was digging around on The Register and I found this article. It happened last year, but probably sums up how a lot of us feel about spam...
So, without further ado...
US man threatens anthrax attack on spammers - Source: www.theregister.co.uk
Charles Booher, 44, apparently snapped after his computer was deluged with ads offering a larger penis and, presumably not requiring a larger penis at that time, launched a terror campaign against the Canadian company he blamed for the outrage.
Booher did not, however, restrict himself to a few shirty emails and perhaps an angry phonecall to DM Contact Management, which dispatched offers of the "Only Reliable, Medically Approved Penis Enhancement" on behalf of Albion Medical.
Nope. This disgruntled spamee threatened the company with anthrax attack, offered to "disable" one employee with a bullet and further torture him with an ice pick and power drill. Clearly still dissatisfied, he then declared he would hunt down and castrate employees if they failed to remove him from the company's mailing list. During his own personal crusade against spam, Booher used the return email address Satan@hell.org.
Douglas Mackay, president of DM Contact Management, said: "This went for a long, long time. He seemed really dedicated to this. He seemed like a guy just crazy enough with nothing to lose that might actually do something."
Of course, Mackay denied any responsibility for the spam tsunami, claiming that a rival firm had dispatched the "unsolicited bulk e-mail". Mackay said such firms "give a bad name to the penis enhancement business".
Indeed, there's nothing worse than distreputable penis enhancement outfits besmirching the good name of the penis enhancement business by bombarding already-satisfied males with unwanted offers of donkeydom.
current mood: Amused
current music: (03) Nickelback - Someday
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Wednesday, November 26th, 2003
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11:31 am - Ever wondered what techs have to deal with?
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So I found this video clip on the web the other day, entitled "Welcome to the Internet Helpdesk" which can be found here
It's total size is about 15Mb, so it'll take a while for you to load it up.
For those who wish to download first and watch later, then click here
Enjoy!
current mood: amused
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Wednesday, November 5th, 2003
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5:02 pm - Just when you think they can't get any stupider...
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So I picked up a phone call, and someone is having problems trying to get Grant Theft Auto: Vice City working. So after a couple of minutes, I have him tell me whats on the CD, and he lists the folders... Audio, Crack and Data.
Me: So that wouldn't be a legal version of the game then?
Him: Ummm.... I don't know
Me: Well if it has a crack folder, then thats a pretty good indication that it's not.
Him: Oh...
Me: So if you're having problems running the game, why don't you try BUYING a copy?
Him: oh.... ok....
Me: Goodbye
current mood: amused
current music: Stabbing Westward - Lies
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Sunday, October 26th, 2003
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1:59 am - Zed album launch party
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| Thursday, September 25th, 2003
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4:32 pm - Why doesn't anyone even want to pay a minimum labour charge?
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So I got a customer on the phone today. Seems she's not happy that theres a minimum labour charge to get their computer sorted - hell, I even fixed the problem and only charged the minimum. So anyway, the mother's unhappy, because her daughter came into the store, picked up the PC, and paid the minimum labour charge, but is now supposed to be sitting in the carpark with a computer and not enough gas to get home.
Now let me ask you - if you went somewhere, knowing you so desperatly needed to buy gas to get home, would you empty your bank account to pay a service charge and take the PC, or would you leave it for another day, when you had more money?
So the mother isn't happy, and wants the money back. Now, we're not a charity, but we're not heartless either. So I offer to her that her daughter can come in, drop the system off here again, and we're reverse the transaction. Then either of them can come back in with the money at a later date and pay the fee to pick up the system.
Apparently this just isn't good enough tho - So she obviously wants the work done for free. Anyway, that was about an hour ago, and noone has brought their system back in to get their charges credited. Hmmm...
current mood: cynical
current music: Gravity Kills - Guilty
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(Read 1 message | Talk to me dammit! )
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| Thursday, September 4th, 2003
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4:33 pm - Bonzai Buddies of the future...
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So I got bored and started thinking about that sodding annoying Bonzai Buddy when I saw it on a customers PC, and came up with some new variants for the future...
Malevolent Bonzai - Think along the lines of Chuckie except in software form "Lets play a game. I think you can fly - go climb onto the roof and jump off!"
Viral Bonzai - Tries to download and install itself automatically onto peoples computers... oh, wait! It already does that...
Backdoor Bonzai - Allows a remote user to control your system, while on your end you see Bonzai running around and doing all the things the remote user is doing
Bonzai OS - An Operating System complete with gaudy colors and theme, laggy performance and spyware. Start Menu replaced by Bonzai Commands, telling him what you want to do so that he can try to load a badly converted program and crash in the attempt.
Bonzai Store - Bonzai has your credit card details and tries to sell you products you don't want. If you accidentally click YES, then it's too late as he sends the order instantly. Have a great laugh when he tells you "Yes means No and No means Yes" then offers you the next product!
Bonzai Player - Play your favourite MP3's, DVD's and other media files in the new Bonzai player. All speech is automatically converted into Bonzai's own language, making it completely impossible to understand, let alone tolerate listening to. Subtitles are disabled.
Skynet Bonzai - All installations of Bonzai Buddy connect via the net and form a massive Virtual Neural Net, eventually becoming self-aware.
current mood:  contemplative
current music: Nirvana - Come As You Are
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(Read 8 messages | Talk to me dammit! )
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| Wednesday, September 3rd, 2003
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8:06 pm - How can you not notice $200 appear in one of your accounts with one of your reference numbers?
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So back in 2000, I was flatting, and had a power bill. When I left, unbeknownst to me, there was still money owing on it. Rather than contacting me to left me know, they sent it on to credit agencies and raped my credit rating. Of course, none of the agencies contacted me either, so how was I to know I had something listed? Wankers.
So 2 years later, I found out. Had to pay Baycorp to see my own fucking credit file.
Found out all the details and phoned the collection company - called RMG. Got told a reference number to use, an account to pay them the money into, and paid them the money - close on $200.
That was in Febuary, and as we can all plainly tell, it is now September. Got a phonecall on the voicemail when I got home. Some person giving me a phone number to call and a reference number. Didn't know what the fuck it was about.
Called the number. It's RMG. The reference number they gave me is different this time too. They're wondering when I'm going to pay my bill! Dumb wankers can't even tell when you've given them money - doesn't that kinda defeat the purpose of running a fucking collection agency!?!?!
Of course, now rather than try to fix their own fucking incompetency, they want me to prove to them that I paid it!
current mood: aggravated
current music: Stabbing Westward - Lies
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Monday, August 25th, 2003
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4:51 pm - Some days, my brain does hurt... Where do they come from, and why won't they go back?
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So we're theives! Theives I tell you!
Or rather, what the customer kept telling me. Some people will try anything to get out of paying a bill. But then again, we could just be theives. I mean, we did charge him for the service of removing 688 virus-riddled files from his computer. Oh, and we deleted his Simple WinScript Virus Contruction Kit too while we were at it. So of course, we're theives...
Fuckwit.
current mood: annoyed
current music: Offspring - Genocide
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(Read 11 messages | Talk to me dammit! )
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| Monday, August 11th, 2003
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7:35 pm - Saturday night...
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So me and ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) freak_ went out on Saturday night. Played some pool, drank some beer, talked some shit. You know, the usual bloke night out. Was all fucking good till the hangover hit - no fucking idea how much i drank.
Must do it again soon....
current mood: contemplative
current music: Ramms+ein - Stripped (Heavy Metal Version
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(Read 16 messages | Talk to me dammit! )
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| Thursday, July 3rd, 2003
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8:32 pm - From the past...
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So I'm looking out the window of my fishbowl at work, when I see a familiar looking orange-headed person. And I'm thinking... no way. That can't be Shadow. So now I was curious, and off I go, wandering through the shop till I see him again - and it is. Apparently he came down to Auckland about 4 months ago, and as it turns out, his sister is actually on of the other tech's flatmates. FReak_, we got another one in Auckland now...
current mood: contemplative
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(Read 1 message | Talk to me dammit! )
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| Thursday, June 19th, 2003
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11:55 am - We have a very sharp log splitter back there, and I'm contemplating using it...
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So I'm having one of those days, and it's starting to get to me. In fact, it got to me quite a while back, and now it's the homocidal urges are getting to me. We have a database, in which we track our repairs. Now, the company has implemented a repair tracking system, which doesn't actually apply to us because we're generally the ones who are fixing everything else the company sends to us, so we get to keep using our database. Somewhere between the head admin and her subordinates here, the message seems to have gone... well, to shit basically.
And sometimes, I wonder, if I'm the only person who has a fucking clue.
So after dragging them both, the head admin, and the manager into the mess, I wait for the dust to settle as our head admin is blasting mridula, trying to figure out how 10 minutes after she's told her what to do, she's already started making bullshit up and confusing other people (and the other admin)
It was touch and go there for a minute... I almost accepted that logsplitter from one of the other techs, while the other said "no jury would ever convict you..."
Update: It's taken half the day, but I've finally been proven right. I feel vindicated :)
current mood: aggravated
current music: Vice City Public Radio MP3
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Sunday, May 11th, 2003
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3:29 pm - I'm sorry, but my psychic powers aren't working at the moment...
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So Bella gets a phone call today (hey, he chose what he wanted to be called, not me...) Anyway, customer wants to know the prices on a SCSI controller and SCSI hard drive. Bella told him we didn't know offhand - and that we'd need to contact our supplier for prices, which we can't do till monday. Customer isn't happy with this answer. Apparently we're supposed to be psychic and know every price of anything. Customer wants to speak to management. The only thing my psychic powers are telling me is that this guy is an idiot. Management tells him exactly the same thing as we did.
Why do some people think they'll get a better answer if they whinge at management?
current mood:  confused
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(Read 1 message | Talk to me dammit! )
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| Monday, April 28th, 2003
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5:25 pm - Some People...
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So this guy comes in after buying an old printer from Cash Converters. He paid $20 for the thing, which of course, doesn't have any ink in it. He wants us to test it to see if it'll work properly. (Please note, it's an HP Deskjet 400, which is at least 8 years old)
Me - "Sorry mate, that thing won't do anything without an ink cartridge inside it"
Him - "So why don't you have an ink cartridge to test it with?"
Me - "because different printers use different cartridges, and cartridges also dry out over time. This would involve writing off a lot of stock. For no gain."
Him - "Well you should have some cartridges to test with. So whats the best way to get an ink cartridge?"
Me - "Well we probably have cartridges for that. Hang on, I'll go check."
/me wanders off and finds the appropriate cartridge and shows it to him
Me - "It's $85"
Him - "thats way to expensive for this printer. No thanks"
customer then leaves the shop, and I can't help wonder why anyone would by a used printer for $20 with no ink, when it's the ink sales where the companies make money. I mean, you can buy a brand new printer with warrenty and 2 ink cartidges in the box, or less than the price of 2 ink cartidges by themselves...
current mood: amused
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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3:53 pm - Definition of "ironic"
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So our Apple Rep convinces his parents to buy a Mac because they're more reliable. They come and buy a Mac (on Hire Purchase, since otherwise the Rep would have sold it directly to them)
Our Apple Rep comes back in the next day. The Apple Mac isn't working. Victim of their own failure rate.
current mood: amused
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(Talk to me dammit! )
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| Thursday, April 24th, 2003
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3:36 pm - I think we've done it... NZ is finally going insane...
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So theres been some stuff in the news lately about obese kids and the like. Okay. fair enough, but some people are taking things to ridiculous levels...
Heres something that was in an article today...
Groups such as Diabetes New Zealand and Fight the Obesity Epidemic want law changes to reduce childhood obesity in New Zealand.
They want legislation to:
Cover the content and placement of food advertisements, including bans
Sorry, that billboard can be seen from school... or from town when the kids go there, or from TV that they watch, or the car radio when parents are driving them somewhere. So you can't advertise it.
Regulate food sold at schools and ban snack vending machines
Bye bye school snack shops... noone will be buying from them anymore.
Control the quality of food that can be sold within 1Km of schools
So what happens to the candy store down the road from school - you get closed down? or do you remain open, but not allowed to actually sell anything? "Sorry kids, you can look but you can't buy"
Promote bicycle use by exempting sales from GST
The people that want to bike will buy them with GST or not. If you don't want to ride a bicycle, you're still not going to buy one...
Remove government support for television
Huh??
Extend Daylight Saving to allow more time for physical activity after school and work
Err... does that mean you actually will tho? or are they going to make a law that you have to spend an hour running around at the end of the day?
Tax video and computer games (because of their association with sedentary behaviour)
My personal favourite here. I mean WTF? They just want to blame computer games for everything don't they. First they teach you to shoot and turn you into a murderer, and now they make you a fat murderer.. Great... *rolleyes*
current mood: cynical
current music: Stabbing Westward - Drugstore
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(Read 2 messages | Talk to me dammit! )
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awake